The Purpose

When we have a family, sometimes life gets so busy that we forget to ask the simple questions.  We forget to check in with each other and just stop communicating.  We often miss the opportunities to remind each other of the important things in life.  A family meeting is one way to circle back on all these things each week and a way to be proactive about family life instead of reactive.

The Method

Each father has to determine what works best for his family.  Daily, weekly, monthly?  How long should the meeting be?  What should be talk about?

We often make this more complicated than it needs to be.  Meetings are simply a place in time to facilitate communication.  Our job is to create that space and facilitate.

The Attitude

Humility, patience, gentleness.  This is not a corporation or military unit.  The humans in the room are not employees or soldiers or servants.  This is not an opportunity to boost your ego or show off or be the boss.  This is your opportunity to serve and lay down yourself for their good.  They are your family whom you love and want the best for.  You want what’s good for them, not what’s good for yourself.  Approach this meeting with listening ears.  This is an opportunity to learn something about yourself and grow.  If you’ve developed a level of trust with your family, ask what you could do differently as a father or husband and be open to listen even if it may hurt a little.

The Agenda

I’ve tried a number of different approaches over the years.  Here are some options to help you get started:

The Daily

Because this meeting happens every day, it is shorter and more concise.  It is an intentional time to reconnect every day.  Aim for 10-25 minutes depending on ages.

• Sing a song
• Read a passage from the bible and discuss
• Ask each family member to share something they enjoyed today
• Ask for any prayer requests and pray

 

The Weekly

Once a week is a great place to be somewhat more in depth than the daily meeting and is particularly powerful as your children reach the ages of 9-18. Here is a link to a free printable outline for your meeting.  It’s a half sheet of paper for each meeting and can be printed double sided.  Keep them in a binder and keep it simple.

• Sing a song
• Read a passage of scripture
• Pray
• Review the schedule for the upcoming week – what is each family member doing this week and are any special changes needed to make this happen
• Ask each family member to share any concerns, issues, comments, or complaints.  Write these down and discuss potential solutions.  Be a good listener.
• Review any concerns, issues, comments, or complains from previous weeks and follow-up with how it is going.
• Plan a short but fun family building activity.  This could be a game or activity that contributes to conversation or relationships.

 

The Monthly

One way to utilize a monthly meeting would be simply to review what’s coming up this month and to help give the family direction and set expectations for the year. This meeting works best when paired with a family activity such as going to the park together or going out to dinner together.

• Sing, Pray, Read
• Make announcements for plans for the next 1-3 months
• Listen to opinions about the plans and change as needed
• Have fun on the outing and enjoy each other

 

The Annual

The annual meeting is used as a goal setting meeting.  Generally, time would need to be set apart before this meeting with each family member individually in order to discuss goals, hopes, and dreams.  Helping your children and spouse think through what they would like to accomplish in the year is a great way to encourage long term thinking.

• Sing, Pray, Read
• Discuss goals and write down actions required to reach goals
  • Spiritual
  • Family
  • Health
  • Education
  • Work
• Write down the goals in a public place and revisit them at the monthly meetings.

The family meetings are one of the most effective tools to help lead a family.  Each meeting provides an intentional place to communicate issues, proactively resolve probles, develop relationships, and guide your family toward higher values and long term thinking.  It may be difficult to start, but we strongly encourage you to just start.  

We pray that you lead each person in your family to love God with all their heart, soul, mind, and strength, and to love others as themselves.