By 2022, in the United States alone, there were 15,873 Starbucks locations. The famous coffee shop has branded an American ritual, the common cup of coffee.

In March 2023 Laxman Narasimhan took over as CEO and created a new mission for the corporate giant: “With every cup, with every conversation, with every community — we nurture the limitless possibilities of human connection.” He continues adding: “We live in a world that is highly disconnected, there’s just a desperate need for togetherness. Loneliness, division, and polarization have become far too common [. . .] The everyday ritual of coffee is a powerful way to connect.”*

Starbucks is aware of a simple principle: rituals build communities. The difference between Starbucks and the family is simply in the number of people who are on the inside.

By extension, strong families build their own culture through meaningful rituals.

5 reasons to build family rituals and traditions

1. Rituals are meaningful when they help us remember. Communion at church helps us remember Christ’s sacrifice for us. Keep in mind that the opposite of ‘to remember’ is not to forget–it is to dis-member. Ritual helps us re-member, put together again, the things worth keeping together. For example, Fathers absolutely should lead the ritual of praying before dinner. Choose other rituals that reinforce your faith and those things most important to your family.
2. The beauty of a ritual is that it is not essential; it is indispensably dispensable. Christmas would carry on without a Christmas tree, birthdays without candles, and dinner without prayer . . . for a time. Eventually, though, once the ritual has been damaged, the integrity of the entire tradition begins to crumble. Once your family commits to a ritual, don’t cut corners. Keep it alive. Persevere – the joy will come and go over the course of time, but the relationships will deepen in all seasons.
3. Keep new rituals simple so you are more likely to repeat them. My wife was born in Scotland. So that our children would understand and care about their cultural heritage, we began the annual ritual of celebrating Robbie Burns day, a Scottish holiday that commemorates her favorite bard. We began simply by eating Scottish food and reciting a few poems. Over the years we have added other little traditions into the mix but have never departed from the basic formula.
4. When trials fall like crashing waves, rituals are anchors that keep the family afloat. If the breadwinner loses his job, or a child is admitted to the hospital, the ritual steadies the family. Daily family prayer, weekly Scripture reading, or weekly singing of worship songs together are powerful rituals. However, do not overlook the simple rituals of pancake Saturdays, the Tuesday evening family walk, or nightly reading to your children before bed. Those too are havens for your children in a chaotic world.
5. Rituals build connections. Starbucks is right. When we participate in rituals we know who we are, where we belong, and how we relate to one another. We look forward to them because we know what to expect. Christmas is the favorite time of the year for many people, because Christmas is the ritual most likely kept by Christians and non-Christians alike. These shared experiences of anticipation and participation build bonds and memories that last a lifetime. Intentionally build those connections in your family.

Don’t forget to build rituals to build romance between you and your wife. Start out by taking her to dinner and plan the rituals you both want to see for your family. You can check out some ideas for engaging with your spouse by reading our article with a few solid date ideas.

*https://stories.starbucks.com/stories/2023/a-new-mission-for-starbucks/